Monday, February 10, 2014

Noelle's Birth Story: God's PERFECT Plan

Through circumstances seen and unseen God was present in every decision that was made, allowing Noelle and I to come out of this delivery healthy and happy. It's what I asked of Him and it's what He gave us. I am eternally grateful!!!!!

So in deciding how I was going to structure this post I have decided to break it up into sections. There's no way I could give all the details because you'd be reading this until tomorrow but don't worry, I will try and be as entertaining as possible including photos, nothing scary!!!!

Let's start on Wednesday night...the night before our induction.

Wednesday Jan. 29th
I know everyone had been asking when I was getting induced and what was going on, sorry to leave you guys in the dark but there was no way I could have answered everyone about how it was going, how I was progressing and did we have the baby yet :( I told myself I would get in the bed at a decent hour in order to get some sort of rest before we started this marathon but yeah no....that didn't happen. I laid "awake" with my eyes closed until it was time to get up and get ready. But I'll get back to that. It was important for me to get Tj something letting him know how great of a husband he has been and how great of a Dad I thought he was going to be. In my search for new dad gifts, I was not impressed so I just decided to make up my own gifts.

 I found this image on Pinterest and decided to change the face of the card I bought with this saying!
There was no selection of cards from a new mom to a new dad, I had to improvise.

 I had a custom shirt made for Tj which you will see later!

I also got him a frame for his office that I'll put a picture of his first moments holding his new baby girl!

We were scheduled to be at the hospital at 1:00am for induction. Oh how fast that time came!!

Thursday Jan. 30th

GO time!

After getting checked in, we were taken to our first room which is where the initial induction phase would start. 

Last belly picture.

Lovely 18 gauge IV!

 Cervidil was used first. You can click on the link if you'd like to know more about this drug. But it is used to soften the cervix in preparation for labor and delivery. After 12 hrs your cervix is checked for progress.

1-30-14 2:45am AND we're off!

Our goal was to get to 3cm and I started at 1cm, 50% effaced and high. 

At about 2 hours after the insertion I started to feel contractions. Nothing major but I could tell this was different than anything I had felt before. The early labor contractions felt similar to mild/moderate menstrual cramps.

After 12 hours of the first Cervidil insert I was a whopping 1cm, 60% effaced and -2 station.
Not the progress I was looking for. It was removed at 3:15pm on 1-30-14.

Decisions Decisions:
We were met by a Nurse Midwife who presented us with a couple of options including a Cook Balloon. *I urge you to find out more about this product if you are scheduled to be induced.* We didn't know much about the balloon. My doctor had mentioned it briefly during a visit as an option to help with dilation. I had forgotten all about it until now. My first question was why? I mean, I was told that we could do up to 4 doses of Cervidil, granted that is 2 days of waiting but we were in no rush to have this baby. It was my first baby and first induction. We knew it would take my body some time to get with the program. And my next question, does it hurt? The answer I got was bull crap...."It has been reported to be uncomfortable". Allow me to share some pictures of this device....

I expressed my desire to go without drugs and that I wanted to be able to continue to move around, walk and get on the ball! I was assured I'd be able to do that. HA!!!! Liar liar pants on freaking fire!!! ARE YOU KIDDING ME?!!! Does this look like I'd be able to do ANY of those things...umm I think not! I digress. We were given the pros and cons of this device and we decided to try another dose of Cervidil, if nothing happened over the next 12 hours, we would go from there. 

4:55pm on Thursday the 2nd Cervidil dose is inserted. 

At this point the contractions were much stronger but still easy to breath through, pass me the ball!

Friday Jan. 31st
My contractions were pretty intense, I could no longer sleep through them. I hadn't had much rest after the 2nd Cervidil insertion. Things were changing. 

12:23am My nurse comes in to check my cervix, she could see on the monitor that I had been having lots of strong, consistent contractions. During her check, my water breaks! I just say "Thank GOD". She laughs and says "Oh honey, this is where your contractions get much worse". I just wanted action...I felt like Dada in Friday After Next "BINGO...we got action"!!! I was just ready for something to happen. We were going on 24 hours in the hospital and I was totally ready to move it along. Plus I thought this may mean I could avoid that balloon of doom!

Decisions Decisions:
We are met a couple hours later by a different Nurse Midwife who tells us she wants to move us to the labor and delivery floor. She gives us some options to speed things along. At this point I'm feeling like we are being rushed. It was only about 2-3 hours since my water had broken and I'm faced again with the Cook balloon. I was 2cm and 60% effaced. The options were 1. Pitocin and Cook balloon or 2. Pitocin. We went with option #2. That damn balloon gave me the creeps and unless it was absolutely necessary I was not ok with making that decision just yet. Plus our Doctor was coming on shift at 7am and I figured we could ask him about the balloon in a few hours. Pitocin I knew we were going to get, it was expected and I knew it was going to happen.

>With every decision we were faced with I prayed that God would lead us in the right direction. 

The nurse called for report to the labor and delivery floor and my stomach was now on the clock. I hurried Tj downstairs to get me something to stuff my face with. Labor and delivery is torture for a hungry girl like myself, clear liquids....ugh, what a joke. 

Friday Jan. 31st 5am- Labor and Delivery floor
6am- Pitocin is started. 

I did a lot of hanging out on the ball! Tj and I walked and got in the positions we were taught during our lamaze and birthing classes. I was on the wireless monitors which made it much easier to get up and down. The bed = the devil!! It was the worst place to be for me not having anything for pain. Moving around and Tj massaging my back was what I needed to get through the contractions. My Doctor arrived shortly after 7am to see me. He told me that the Pitocin needed to be increased at a steady rate in order to keep my labor moving. My water had broken and I was now on the clock to deliver within a certain amount of time. Ok, we're going to increase....but by 1mL an hour every 15-30min. Ummm...I'm sorry what?!! That's fast, I was not excited. 

The contractions were MUCH more intense but thank God I didn't lose control of my breathing. It was the single most important thing in dealing with the contractions. 

So I'd say my pain was about 7 out of 10 at this point which was also my goal for pain. I was told by the nurse that I was hosed if I wanted to go without drugs if I was already a 7/10. 

9am- My Doctor checked me and I was 4cm and 70% effaced. Glad we had made some progress but I was a little nervous for what was to come. 

I felt my arm was really cool and I looked down, infiltrated. GREAT! This meant another IV during these really intense contractions.

Something happened...someone flipped the switch!!! The contractions were almost unbearable now. I did every weird position I could to try and relieve the pain. I was moaning like those women on the birthing videos. The nurses heard me singing at the nurses station. LOL! My pain was a 10/10 and I was vomiting while on my hands and knees. VOMITING...yes!! This is good I thought! I remember from nursing school that once a woman is nauseous and vomiting it may be because she is close to transition or 8cm. Don't ask me the time, I was in a vortex. I had no idea of the timing. All I could think was ONE CONTRACTION AT A TIME!!!! For what felt like FOoooReeeeEVvvvvEeeeeR I dealt with this insane amount of pain and my breathing was getting hard to control, the relaxation was almost out of the window. 

Moment of truth: The Nurse Midwife came in to check me due to these crazy stupid contractions that were coming back to back with hardly any rest in between. I could see the monitor and I'm looking at these monster contractions and I'm thinking "why in the hell did I wanna do this without drugs, this is crazy". I never said it out loud but I was totally thinking it. She removes her gloves and says 4 and 90. UHHHHH......come again?!!!!! 4cm, you have GOT to be kidding me. I felt like someone had took my breath away. I was crushed!! After 2 hours of 10/10 pain I had had it, 4cm!! There was no way. I was beyond exhausted and my will to continue without meds was gone. I was ready to talk pain options. 

Decisions Decisions:
I've got to tell you. I was disappointed to be talking about these but I really had no desire to go on like this. I just didn't want to. I was reminded that I had nothing to prove to anyone but it wasn't that for me. I had not wanted any pain medications for me. I had pictured an unmedicated birth since before getting married and before children were even on the table. But I had also not pictured having to be induced or the use of Pitocin. Ahh what the hell!

Option 1: IV pain meds- Fentanyl
This drug would take the edge off for maybe a couple of hours. I wasn't guaranteed any rest but it was possible that I could take a short "nap"but after it had worn off, it would have been back to the same. The baby would also feel any affects of this drug. That was not an option for me so it was a NO to option 1.

Option 2: The walking epidural- Fentanyl
This option would use the same drug but it would be inserted into my back. Lots of people I found out have no idea what this option is and I had only known about it because I had a friend who had it with her birth a few months back. I had done some research so I knew what it was. This option would take the edge off but would be a continuous infusion hooked to a button so that I could control it if I needed an extra dose. I could continue to walk and do the positions that made me comfortable. I was told by the anesthesiologist that the majority of women got the full epidural with anesthesia that made them numb to the pain. The walking epidural was usually used until the women got to 4 or 5 cm, not to use at the end. I told her my goal for pain was 7/10 and that I was currently a 10/10. She was not convinced that this option would help me much. She told Tj that she would be available when I was ready to switch to the full epidural. I wanted to provide a link with more info but I couldn't find anything that was really helpful.

Option 3: Full epidural
This was not an option for me. But let me just say.....I completely understand this option!!!! LOL! 100% I get it! It may have not been for me but God knows I get it. 

So option 2 it was!!

1:30pm- Walking epidural is placed. You have to stay in bed for an hour to make sure that the medication is equally distributed on each side of your body. This hour was hell because like I said before the bed is the worse place to labor. I wanted to jump out of that bed with every contraction. I had  a small period of rest after the medication completely kicked in but it only took my pain to an 8/10. 

Approximately 3pm- The Nurse Midwife came in to check me.....complete!!!! I couldn't believe it!!! 6cm in 2 hours!! WHAT?! Nobody but sweet Baby Jesus was responsible for this miracle. It was time to push!!!!

I pushed for about 30 min with my nurse. She told me to pause so she could get my Doctor. *Ok pause- MY DOCTOR is very significant here!! There are 16 doctors in my OBGYN's practice and MY Doctor was actually the one that was going to deliver me. God is good!!

She came back with very unexpected news. Stop pushing, the Doctor has to go to an emergency C-section. I felt like crying but I had no idea what I was about to face for the next hour. OMG!!! Not pushing for an hour can only be described as being in the middle of the desert for days and being told you are not allowed to drink the gallon of water within arms reach!!!!! It took everything I had not to push. After pushing previously I knew how great it felt to push against the contractions. My pain was still an 8/10 and that combined with pressure to push was horrible. And once again I found myself confined to the bed. But you know....we thank God that we weren't the one's rushing off for an emergency C-section. During that time, the baby moved further down without me pushing, probably saving me some energy.

After the hour, there he was, my Doctor. I felt like singing. I pushed for about 20 min. And there SHE was, OUR sweet baby girl!!!

God is Amazing!!!!
Jan. 31st at 4:38pm

Due to the concern about Noelle's size, there were NICU nurses prepared to take her to intensive care if she was under 5 lbs. Her going to NICU right away meant there would be no skin to skin for the first hour and no immediate breastfeeding. But I trusted God and figured she'd be much bigger than 5 lbs anyway. She was placed on the scale and she was.....drum roll please........5.04 lbs!!!!! Wow! LOOK AT GOD!! Won't He do it?!!! LOL! I was shocked she was that small and amazed at God's grace. 

Length: 17 3/4 inches

Every single detail of my labor was perfectly orchestrated by my Lord and Savior Jesus Christ. When I tell you that ANYTHING could have went left...ANYTHING!!! God gave me the foresight to make the decisions that keep me and my Noelle safe. He gave me the strength to do what my Nurse, Doctor and Anesthesiologist thought I couldn't. He allowed my husband and mother to provide me with so much love and support during this process. Noelle is God's gift to us and I pray she will be His gift to many others. I will NEVER forget His grace and mercy during this time in our lives and I hope that I passed the test He gave me. I praise his Holy name for the opportunity to be brought closer to Him by the situation we were placed in.  

 Father Hazley's custom shirt.

What a beautiful day it was to bring our girl home!

 The end of an more selfies!


Yoni LB said...

Awww...So adorable. I almost shed a tear (seriously). Can't wait to see her in June when I move back to the O. So excited. The T-shirt is so cool...really like.

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